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Too many men are getting something wrong when they go down on a woman (aka cunnilingus). And it's all because of the clitoris. Yes, we all know that the clit is a particularly sensitive part of a woman's vagina. Yes, women want you to pay attention to it. But for fuck's sake, don't ONLY focus on the clitoris. I've heard of a handful of men following the same recipe. Tell me if it sounds familiar: You go down. You maybe tease around it a bit in the beginning, but then you find a comfy spot, get your lips locked around the clit, and you sit there, sucking. At some point, you start thrusting your fingers inside her, and that's where you stay until she comes. How long does it take her to come? Some women faster than others, I imagine. But seeing ladies have had several guys follow the same recipe, it's becoming boring. Predictable. Utterly lifeless. Men, can you please, god, ravish her pussy ? Pay attention to her entire  pussy?  Think of it this way. The head of your penis is particularly sensitive. Does that mean you only want a woman to pay attention to the tip? Fuck no! That would be super intense and yes, you would come, but it'd feel... not enough , right? Because you want the fullness of your erection to feel EVERYTHING!  It's the same for women! Don't just settle on the clit like this is some kind of production line. Like you're just trying to get her orgasm out of the way as fast as possible so you can feel like your work is done (which I'm so sad to say I think is often the case). She wants your mouth all over her ! She wants your tongue INSIDE her! She wants you licking and tasting and exploring and spreading and feasting on every part of her. She wants you making out with her pussy the way you make out with her mouth. She wants to feel the passion of your breath, of your slow and ravishing exploration of her lips. She wants you to love making out with her down there, in every edge, every corner that turns you on to taste and feel. Of course, the clit should get attention. Of course, penetration should grow and progress into a crescendo of orgasmic ecstasy. But for fuck's sake, make out with her whole pussy, not just a fraction of it. UPDATE: I wrote this blog post in a fit of rage. After reflecting on it a lot, I want to clarify something: it isn't about what you do; it's how you do it . I was frustrated because I, and other people I know, are fed up with method-based sexuality rather than presence-based sexuality. I see now that this post only emphasizes the method rather than presence. So, I'd like to add this important final note: It doesn't matter what you do! It only matters that you're present in the moment rather than following some kind of mental checklist. She might like it my way, and she may even prefer the method I mentioned before. What you do isn't the point. The point is you need to pay attention and follow the moment.

Some of my most profound personal growth has come from self-pleasure. Hear me out. We all have our varying degrees of mental crap we carry around with us, right? Part of mine is a mish-mash of guilt for not giving enough to others, guilt for being 'selfish' (more on that another day), and the constant shrinking to pretend like I'm 'normal' or less of an abomination to the world. And this mess utterly fucked (not in a good way) my ability to experience pleasure - both in the bedroom and in my life. Fortunately, self-pleasure can be a psychological shortcut to breaking down those mental barriers for good. What happens sexually when you shrink Your libido is often connected to your sense of safety in the world. The safer you feel in your body, in yourself, the more turned on you're likely to be in general. In contrast, when you shrink and cave in on yourself to hide yourself from the world, your libido is less likely to be its full-bellied, delirious self. This can play a role in all kinds of crap, like obvious struggles in the bedroom with partners, sexual health issues, and probably the most obvious but most painful of all: a numbness to and difficulty experiencing pleasure in life. Sex is never just sex. Good sex isn't just about orgasms in the bedroom (or on the kitchen counter). It's about feeling good in your body any time of day. It's about loving the way your breath feels. It's about your ability to experience joy. To feel alive. To feel good about being alive. And this - THIS - is why self-pleasure is such a tremendous tool for your overall well-being. Because when you practice self-pleasure, you show your body how worthy it is of feeling good. You shatter through the grip suffocating your joy and show your body what life can be. What is conscious self-pleasure? When you masturbate, something happens in the depths of your psyche. Whether you realise it or not, you're communicating with your body. You're letting it know what it deserves and how it should be treated. And it goes both ways! Did you know that your body is constantly communicating with you? Most us have forgotten how to listen to our bodies, thanks to the constant drumming on from the world that we need to think . We're repeatedly told not to feel and to make every decision with our brains. This sounds super clever until you've built a life that makes sense on paper, but feels like shit. You've done all the things, achieved all the stuff, but you can't understand why you're depressed. Sound familiar? The truth is, if you pay attention to how different things actually feel (as opposed to how you think they should feel), you start to notice that your body is responding to you in every moment. Conscious self-pleasure is slowing all the way down when you masturbate, so you notice how your body is responding, and give it what it truly wants. When you use your touch to communicate to your body that it is loved, appreciated, heard, and respected, something within your cells cracks open to life. How your body speaks to you It makes me so sad that so many of us have lost touch with what actually feels good and what doesn't. I did. At the end of my marriage, I 'woke up,' realising I didn't know what I liked and what I didn't. My house didn't feel like mine. None of my furniture felt like 'me.' I didn't know what music I liked. I was so far removed from what brought me pleasure that it was like I had to learn who I was all over again - I simply had no idea anymore. Expansion and contraction Paying attention to my body helped me figure out what I really want in life (it still does). And it all comes down to expansion and contraction. Expansion = nice Contraction = not nice Have you ever felt your heart expand in your chest or feel like it's being crushed? That's expansion and contraction. Now, apply the same concept to the muscles in your jaw, your shoulders... And your private parts. The more you can slow down and feel , the more refined you can get. The smaller the muscle you can pinpoint. For example, when a woman really slows down with her practice, she may notice a specific spot on her vulva that contracts when touched while another spot expands. Listen to this. Follow this. How to practice conscious self-pleasure Conscious self-pleasure isn't about orgasms. Well, it is, and it isn't. More specifically, it's about pleasure. Orgasm is one big subcategory of pleasure, but it isn't IT. The richness of pleasure is much broader, and while you definitely want orgasms on the menu, focusing only on orgasm limits your potential. For example, when I started addressing my relationship with my sexuality, I had to slow all the way down . My yoni was completely closed for action. In fact, if I forced an orgasm out of her when she was contracting (because it happens all. the. time. when you're not listening to your body ) , she shut down even further. My libido was not available for play dates. She did not want to be forced into GIVING pleasure (or, more accurately, having pleasure taken from her against her will); she wanted to submit to RECEIVING it. And that's a completely different energetic experience. Where to start Feel it out. As much as you may want the orgasm, your body may not be ready for actual masturbation. Start simple. Loosen up the rest of your body first with things like: Long, candle-lit baths I know, I know... It's cliche, but it's true. Many weekends, I'd spend hours in the bath, with candles burning and music playing. If you've got a busy mind, slowing down to enjoy a long bath can be almost as difficult as meditation. That's okay. If it's not for you, try something else. Sensual touch Slow down and stroke your body - everywhere. The kind of soft caresses you'd get from a lover. But don't imagine a lover doing it - this is disconnecting from your body. BECOME the lover. BE the lover your body deserves. This became one of my most surprising experiences because I had no idea how sexually responsive certain parts of my body were, like my neck, my head, and the space on my ribcage between my breasts. Even my hands and arms. Notice what feels good and give it to yourself. Body massages Coconut oil is my go-to massage oil because you can use it inside and outside. ;) Plus, it's easy to buy from the store. I like to use it all the way from my neck, across my breasts, chest, and down to my thighs. Some will massage up to their heads. Follow what feels good. Energetically, if you want to get into the tantra-ness of it, massaging from your forehead to your private parts connects all your chakras in your pleasure practice, which can enhance your potential for full-body orgasms. ;) Plus, I like to think the oil makes your body more conductive - which is good for all the juicy energies you want moving around your body. Getting deeper The following practice is for women, because I'm a woman, and this post is about self-pleasure. But the approach will be similar for men, too, I imagine. Simply put: feel it out. For ladies with va-jay-jays, when you get to the point where touching your yoni is feeling like expansion, start exploring, slowly, layer by layer. If you feel a 'contraction' in your body at any stage, always stop doing what you're doing and go back to the last thing that felt like expansion. Again, this isn't about the orgasm - yet. It's about becoming conscious of what feels good. Yoni massage I know it may sound obvious or basic, but when you're exploring your vagina, start just with the outside. Massage your labia (preferably with your coconut oil, because it's wonderful), and experience it ). Stop rushing the orgasm. Sink into the basics of pleasure, the simplicity of it, the innocence of it. ONLY progress to the next level when you feel the pull from your body to go deeper. The stages that I progress through go like this: Outer lips Inner lips and clit The entrance to the vagina The G-spot The cervix In the beginning, all she (my vagina) wanted was a massage of the outer lips - she didn't even want me to touch my clitoris. And even so, I still had my orgasms. They were such 'innocent' orgasms - I don't know how else to explain it. I felt such pleasure just from external touch. When you're following your body's lead, even if it doesn't look the way you think it should look, it feels good on a cellular level. And that's the whole point, right? Feeling good? Getting tremendous joy even from the simplest of pleasures? Becoming so sensitive and aware of every touch that you come even without penetration? I mean...this! It was through this process of gradual progression with my pleasure that I came to appreciate the innocent and natural experience that our sexuality truly is. It isn't about the cum shots or the BDSM (though those can have their rightful place in your well-being, too); it's about learning how to  feel . Am I doing this right? It will take practice to feel the difference between when your body starts to call you to make the next move and when your mind is doing it, but keep testing it out. The better you get at listening to your body's desires and responding to them, the more expansive each layer of pleasure will feel. Trussstt meeeee. Sometimes your mind wins, and you force the orgasm despite feeling a contraction. That's okay. Your body will forgive you. You can try again next time. Your body is resilient and wired for pleasure - you will get there. :) Why am I crying? Sometimes you'll be overwhelmed by emotion after an orgasm. There are several reasons you might experience this. You're releasing trapped emotions. Your body clings to stuff out of fear. Orgasm is a release. Sometimes the emotions release, too. Let the emotion flow, and let it go. You forced an orgasm when you were contracting. These don't feel as good because your body wasn't there with your mind. Same thing, though. Let the emotion flow, and let it go. You're in awe of the pleasure you've been holding yourself back from. This one's the most beautiful. Sometimes you'll be so moved by your pleasure that you can't help but sob. For me, I couldn't believe I'd been holding my body captive the way I had, when all she wanted, all she deserved, was this... life-altering beauty. It's like an awakening, and I pray you can have something like it too, because what comes AFTER - when you let yourself have all the pleasure you want - is pure, undulating ecstasy. Now, go have fun Masturbation is a strange thing to consider when talking about personal growth, but it's real, and it can be truly incredible. When you learn how to hear and respond to what feels good in your body, you don't just get better at orgasms. You lay the foundations for making more joyful decisions in your life. You get better at saying no to things that feel like shit. You get better at choosing a life of pleasure rather than settling for the crap your brain thinks you should settle for. You start building a life that feels orgasmic. Happy playing. xx

Most of the sex I've had has been utterly insufficient. Most of it was all about getting to the orgasm. Taking the orgasm. As if the shortest, fastest route to somewhere is always the best. And what a shallow way to have sex that is. When you don't savour every sensation. When you don't mellow in the place where hunger and satisfaction intermingle. You miss all the ways those nooks and crannies open. There are ripples of pleasure inside a woman. Even women themselves don't seem to realise the depth of it. Tightly bound ripples of nerves in all the depths of her vagina that do not open without...stillness. Presence. There are levels of pleasure she will simply never reach with a goal-oriented approach to sex. It always baffles me how rushed some men are. How uncomfortable they are with their hunger. How much they miss that the hunger is such a magnificent part of it. It's always like they want to be rid of it. Like the orgasm will relieve them of the discomfort of the hunger. But why? Isn't the hunger the turn on? Isn't the tension what makes us feel alive? Why are we so desperate to douse that fire with a quick orgasm? Why in God's name are we not burning in it?

Credence by Penelope Douglas...I loved this book. A few hours after finishing it, I'm still steaming in the afterglow of electric sexual tension. Here's my review... Credence by Penelope Douglas: A quick overview If you don't know about it already, it's a story about an almost 18-year-old woman whose parents die. She gets invited to live with her father's estranged younger step-brother (her uncle, technically, who she's never met, and they aren't biologically related) and his two sons, who are a little older than her. Testing social norms It's smut. So, you must know, it's sexy as fuck. She ends up sleeping with all three of them (after her 18th birthday), obviously. But what I loved more than that was the exploration of sexuality and intimacy in a controversial setting. It really tested the 'rules' of society - challenging how far is 'too far' and making you question why. Whether or not I agree with the 'okayness' of it happening in real life is irrelevant. I just loved that it opened a window into an alternative, genuinely beautiful experience for us to peak at. For us to open up to. To let ourselves be a little more okay with 'different', so we can maybe explore the typically taboo things we like, but hold ourselves back from for fear of what others think. Granted, whether it would pan out like this in reality is debatable, but stories and concepts don't always have to be based on reality. Shameless sex I also loved the lack of shame. Not that there weren't elements of it. There was some ugly slut shaming and the expected squirming around the fact that they're family, but she didn't cave into herself from it. She didn't behave differently because she'd allowed herself to do these things. In my own life, and I'm sure many women's lives, I've completely shut down from sexual shame. I'm inspired by how she allowed herself to have the experience without shriveling away. Character growth Lastly, I loved the emotional development of all the characters - especially the men. They all evolved, like their coming together (pun playfully noted) was exactly what all of them needed. In the end... I knew when I started the book that it was controversial. In the early stages, I couldn't imagine finding a way to the end without it turning icky. But Penelope crafted it tenderly, turning what even I assumed would be a really sticky, shameful journey into a loving, special, and truly enviable experience. It's not an award-winner or anything, and the overarching hero's journey was somewhat predictable at times, but the characters rocked, and it breaks barriers and perceptions around sexuality, which I'm always up for. Want to read it? It's available in various formats (including Kindle) on Amazon. Buy it via my link, and I'll even earn a little commission at no extra cost to you. :) Enjoy!

Tantra is a unique and multifaceted philosophy that encompasses both sexuality and spirituality. It's an ancient practice that originated in India and has evolved over centuries. Understanding the concept of Tantra requires delving into its origins and core principles. Understanding the Concept of Tantra Tantra, an ancient practice originating in India, has a rich and fascinating history that spans centuries. It emerged as a revolutionary response to the rigid ascetic traditions (characterised by abstinence from sensual pleasures) prevalent at the time, offering a fresh perspective on spirituality and transcendence. Unlike the ascetics who renounced the physical world, Tantra embraced the idea that the physical and the divine could be integrated harmoniously. As Tantra evolved over time, it spread its wings and found its way into various cultures, absorbing elements from different traditions and spiritual practices. This cross-pollination enriched Tantra, making it a diverse and multifaceted approach to spiritual growth. Origins and Evolution of Tantra Tantra initially emerged as a rebellion against the prevailing asceticism, which viewed the physical world as a hindrance to spiritual growth. Tantra challenged this notion, embracing the belief that spirituality could be found not by renouncing the physical but by integrating it into the spiritual journey. Over time, Tantra expanded its reach and influence, spreading across different regions and cultures. As it encountered new traditions and practices, Tantra absorbed and assimilated them, incorporating diverse elements into its framework. This process of evolution allowed Tantra to adapt and grow, making it a dynamic and ever-evolving spiritual path. Core Principles of Tantra At its core, Tantra is built upon a set of principles that guide you towards spiritual growth and enlightenment. One of the fundamental beliefs of Tantra is that all aspects of life, including sexuality, can serve as channels for spiritual development. Unlike many other spiritual traditions that view desires as obstacles, Tantra encourages you to embrace your desires and recognise them as vehicles for self-discovery and connection with the divine. By merging spirituality and sexuality, Tantra offers a unique pathway to tap into a deeper sense of intimacy, pleasure, and union with the universe. It teaches that through conscious and mindful engagement with your desires, you can transcend the limitations of the ego and experience a profound connection with yourself, your partners, and the world around you. Further, Tantra emphasises the importance of cultivating awareness and presence in every moment. It invites you to be fully present in your experiences, whether it be during intimate encounters, daily activities, or spiritual practices. By cultivating this heightened state of awareness, you can deepen your connection with the divine and experience a profound sense of unity and oneness. Simply put, Tantra is a holistic and inclusive spiritual practice that offers a unique perspective on integrating the physical and the divine. Its origins in ancient India and subsequent evolution across cultures have enriched its teachings, making it a versatile and transformative path for those seeking spiritual growth and enlightenment. Tantra and Sexuality Tantra has long been associated with the exploration of sexuality and the harnessing of sexual energy. It's believed that sexual energy, often referred to as Kundalini energy, is the life force of Tantra. This powerful energy is seen as a vital source that can be used for personal and spiritual growth. In the realm of Tantra, sexual energy is not limited to physical gratification but is seen as a transformative force that can be channeled into a creative power. It's believed that by harnessing and directing this energy, you can embark on a profound journey towards self-realisation and spiritual awakening. The Role of Sexual Energy in Tantra Sexual energy in Tantra is not viewed as something to be suppressed or denied, but rather as a potent force that can be harnessed and directed towards higher states of consciousness. It's seen as a sacred energy that can connect with the divine and deepen your understanding of yourself and the world around you. Through various practices such as meditation, breathwork, and specific rituals, Tantra seeks to awaken and activate the dormant Kundalini energy that resides at the base of the spine. As this energy rises through the chakras, it can bring about profound spiritual experiences and heightened awareness. By working with sexual energy, Tantra aims to cultivate a deep sense of intimacy and connection, not only with oneself but also with others. It encourages you to approach sexuality with reverence and mindfulness, fostering a deeper understanding of the body, pleasure, and the potential for spiritual growth through sexual experiences. Shattering Myths: Tantra is Not Just About Sex Despite popular misconceptions, Tantra is not solely focused on sexual practices. While sexual rituals and practices are indeed part of Tantra, they represent only a fraction of its teachings. Tantra encompasses a holistic approach to life, encompassing various spiritual practices that extend far beyond the bedroom. Mindfulness and meditation play a significant role in Tantra, as practitioners strive to cultivate a deep awareness of the present moment. Through meditation, you quiet the mind, transcend the ego, and connect with your inner self. Breathwork is another essential aspect of Tantra. By consciously controlling the breath, you can influence the body's energy flow and enhance your overall well-being. Breathwork techniques are often used to awaken and circulate sexual energy throughout the body, leading to heightened states of pleasure and spiritual connection. Further, Tantra emphasises the importance of embracing all aspects of life, including the mundane and the ordinary. It advocates for you to find the divine in everyday experiences and approach all activities with mindfulness and presence. Ultimately, Tantra is a path of self-discovery and self-realisation. It invites you to explore your inner landscapes, embrace your desires and fears, and cultivate a deep connection with yourself and the world around you. While sexuality is undoubtedly a part of this journey, it's just one piece of the intricate tapestry that is Tantra. Tantra and Spirituality The Spiritual Dimensions of Tantra Tantra recognises that spirituality is not confined to religious ceremonies or dogmas but is inherent in every aspect of existence. Through Tantra, you can transcend the limitations of your ego and connect with the divine consciousness that resides within you and in all things. By embracing the spiritual dimensions of Tantra, you can experience a profound sense of unity and oneness with the universe. Tantra as a Path to Enlightenment Enlightenment, often described as self-realisation or liberation, is a central goal in many spiritual traditions. Tantra offers a unique path to enlightenment by embracing all aspects of your being, including your desires and emotions. It encourages you to explore and integrate the different facets of yourself, leading to a more profound understanding of who you are and your interconnectedness with the cosmos. The Intersection of Tantra, Sexuality, and Spirituality How Tantra Balances Sexuality and Spirituality In the realm of Tantra, sexuality and spirituality are not seen as opposing forces but rather as intertwined aspects of human existence. Tantra teaches you how to navigate the complex interplay between these realms, finding harmony and balance in their union. Through Tantra, you can cultivate a heightened sense of awareness and intention in your sexual experiences, transforming them into sacred acts of love and connection. The Role of Intimacy in Spiritual Awakening Intimacy, both with yourself and with others, plays a crucial role in spiritual awakening on the Tantric path. Tantra invites you to approach intimacy as a gateway to self-discovery and transcendence. By cultivating deep connections with others, you can dissolve your boundaries and access profound states of bliss, ecstasy, and unity that are inherently spiritual in nature. Practicing Tantra in Modern Times Adapting Ancient Wisdom to Contemporary Life While Tantra has deep roots in ancient traditions, it's also a living philosophy that can be adapted to suit the needs and realities of modern times. In today's fast-paced society, Tantra offers a valuable lens through which you can navigate the challenges and demands of daily life while staying connected to your spiritual essence. By integrating Tantric practices into your routines, you can cultivate a more mindful, balanced, and fulfilling existence. The Benefits and Challenges of Embracing Tantra Today Embracing Tantra in the modern world comes with its own set of benefits and challenges. On one hand, it provides an opportunity for personal growth, enhanced intimacy, and expanded consciousness. On the other hand, societal taboos, misconceptions, and stereotypes surrounding Tantra can create barriers to its full exploration and understanding. Nonetheless, the rewards of incorporating Tantra into your life far outweighs the challenges, offering a path to profound transformation and self-discovery. A Journey of Personal and Spiritual Growth The intersection of Tantra, sexuality, and spirituality opens up a path to self-realisation, bliss, and unity. By understanding Tantra's origins, core principles, and practices, you can embrace the power of sexual energy and spirituality to embark on a journey of personal and spiritual growth. Whether in ancient times or modern society, Tantra remains a valuable guide for those seeking a more profound and integrated life experience.

Tantra has gained popularity recently as an ancient practice offering a holistic approach to spirituality and sexuality. While it may seem mysterious and complex, Tantra is actually a practice that anyone can explore and benefit from. In this beginner's guide, we'll delve into the world of Tantra, its origins, principles, and various aspects, allowing you to gain a deeper understanding of this ancient practice. Understanding Tantra: A Brief Overview Before we delve into the specifics of Tantra, let's first gain a general understanding of this ancient practice. Tantra originated in ancient India and has deep roots in Hinduism and Buddhism. It's a practice that combines spirituality, meditation, and physical techniques to help you achieve self-realisation and deeper connections with yourself and others. When we think of Tantra, we often associate it with its sexual aspects. But it's important to note that Tantra isn't just about sexuality. It encompasses many practices and philosophies that aim to transform you holistically. The Origins and History of Tantra Tantra can be traced back to the Indus Valley Civilization around 3000 BCE. Ancient civilizations originally practiced it as a way to honour the divine feminine energy and establish a holistic connection with the universe. The ancient texts and scriptures of Hinduism and Buddhism, such as the Vedas and the Tantras, contain profound insights into the practice of Tantra. Over time, Tantra evolved and spread to different regions, each incorporating its own cultural and religious influences. In Hinduism, Tantra became a path to spiritual liberation, with various sects and schools emerging, each with its own unique practices and rituals. In Buddhism, Tantra played a significant role in the Vajrayana tradition, which was seen as a means to attain enlightenment in a single lifetime. Despite its connection to ancient traditions, Tantra remains relevant in the modern world, offering you a pathway to spiritual growth and self-discovery. Today, Tantra is practiced by people from diverse backgrounds and belief systems, seeking to explore the depths of their being and connect with the divine. The Core Principles of Tantra At the heart of Tantra are several core principles that guide its practice. These principles revolve around the belief that everything in the universe is interconnected and that our bodies, minds, and souls are expressions of divine energy. Tantra teaches us to embrace and use this energy to transform our lives. Another fundamental principle of Tantra is the power of love and devotion. Tantra encourages you to cultivate a deep sense of love and devotion towards yourself, others, and the divine. Through love and devotion, we can experience profound connections and transcend the boundaries of the ego. Then, there's honouring the body as a sacred vessel. In Tantra, the body is seen as a sacred temple that houses our divine essence. Through various physical techniques, such as yoga, breathwork, and sensual touch, Tantra seeks to awaken and channel the divine energy within the body. Cultivating awareness and mindfulness is also a key principle of Tantra. Tantra teaches us to be fully present in the moment and to observe our thoughts and emotions without judgment. By cultivating awareness, we can break free from conditioned patterns and beliefs, opening ourselves to new possibilities and experiences. Tantra also emphasises the balance between masculine and feminine energies. It recognises that both masculine and feminine energies exist within each individual, regardless of gender. Tantra seeks to harmonise these energies, allowing for a deeper integration of our inner selves and a greater understanding of the interconnectedness of all things. Tantra is a profound and multifaceted practice that offers you a pathway to self-realisation and spiritual growth. It combines ancient wisdom with modern insights, inviting us to explore the depths of our being and forge deeper connections with ourselves and the world around us. The Spiritual Aspects of Tantra While Tantra is often associated with sexuality, its spiritual aspects are equally important and profound. By incorporating spiritual practices, Tantra allows you to deepen your connection with yourself and the divine. Tantra is a spiritual path that goes beyond the physical realm. It is a journey of self-discovery and self-realisation, where you explore the depths of your being and connect with the divine essence that resides within you. One of the fundamental practices in Tantra is meditation. By quieting the mind and focusing on the present moment, meditation helps you cultivate awareness and connect with your inner self. Through meditation, Tantra practitioners can experience a sense of oneness with the universe and tap into their own divine potential. In Tantra, meditation is not just about sitting in silence. It is a dynamic practice that involves various techniques such as chanting mantras, visualisations, and focusing on specific energy centers in the body, known as chakras. These practices help you awaken your spiritual energy and open yourself up to higher states of consciousness. Guide to Tantra and Meditation One of the key aspects of Tantra is the integration of meditation into daily life. Tantra teaches that every moment can be a meditation if approached with awareness and presence. Whether it is eating a meal, walking in nature, or engaging in a conversation, Tantra encourages you to bring a meditative quality to all your actions. Through this mindful approach to life, Tantra practitioners learn to cultivate a deep sense of gratitude and appreciation for the present moment. They become more attuned to the subtle energies surrounding them and develop a heightened sensitivity to the beauty and interconnectedness of all things. The Role of Energy in Tantra Central to the spiritual aspect of Tantra is the understanding and manipulation of energy. Tantra teaches that everything in the universe is made up of energy, including our bodies and emotions. By working with energy, Tantra practitioners can unlock dormant potential, release blockages, and experience profound states of bliss and ecstasy. Energy is seen as the life force that animates all living beings. In Tantra, it is believed that each individual has a unique energetic blueprint known as the pranic body. This energetic blueprint determines their physical, mental, and emotional well-being. Through techniques such as breathwork, visualisation, and movement, you can learn to channel and cultivate energy, leading to heightened spiritual experiences and a deeper understanding of their divine nature. One of the practices used to harness and direct energy in Tantra is known as Kundalini Awakening. Kundalini is the dormant spiritual energy that lies coiled at the base of the spine. Through specific practices, this energy can be awakened and guided up through the chakras, resulting in a profound spiritual awakening. As you work with your energy, you may experience sensations of warmth, tingling, or even intense waves of pleasure. These experiences are seen as signs of the energy flowing freely and harmoniously within the body, leading to a state of balance and spiritual alignment. Ultimately, the spiritual aspects of Tantra are about transcending the physical body's limitations and connecting with the divine essence that resides within all of us. It is a path of self-discovery, transformation, and union with the divine. Through the practices of meditation and energy work, Tantra offers a profound and transformative journey for those who are willing to explore its depths. The Physical Practice of Tantra While Tantra encompasses spiritual and energetic aspects, it also includes physical practices that aim to awaken sexual energy, enhance pleasure, and foster deep connections with oneself and others. Basic Tantric Techniques for Beginners For beginners, basic tantric techniques focus on creating a safe and sacred space, building trust and intimacy, and cultivating presence during intimate moments. These techniques often involve slowing down, deepening the breath, and engaging all the senses to experience the present moment fully. Exploring tantric techniques with a trusted partner can lead to profound experiences of physical and emotional connection, mutual pleasure, and expanded awareness. The Importance of Breath in Tantra One of the most fundamental aspects of tantric practice is conscious breathing. Awareness and control of breath can help you connect with your body, increase sensitivity, and intensify pleasure. Deep, relaxed breathing can also help calm the mind and increase focus during intimate encounters. Learning to synchronise breath with a partner can create a deep sense of harmony and unity, facilitating a heightened state of presence and connection. Tantra and Relationships While Tantra can be practiced individually, it also offers powerful techniques to enhance intimacy and deepen connections in romantic relationships. Enhancing Intimacy through Tantra Tantra teaches that every moment can be an opportunity for connection and intimacy. By bringing presence, mindfulness, and awareness into everyday interactions, couples can cultivate a deeper sense of love, trust, and understanding. Tantric practices such as eye-gazing, loving touch, and conscious communication can help couples break through barriers, transcend limitations, and experience profound levels of intimacy and ecstasy. Communication and Consent in Tantra Clear communication and consent are essential aspects of tantric practice. Tantra emphasizes the importance of open and honest dialogue, creating a safe space where partners can express desires, boundaries, and fears without judgment. By establishing clear boundaries and practicing active listening, couples can deepen their connection and create a mutually satisfying and nourishing experience. Common Misconceptions about Tantra Due to its association with sexuality and the secretive nature of some practices, Tantra is often misunderstood. Let's debunk some common myths surrounding Tantra. Debunking Tantra Myths Tantra is often misunderstood as a purely sexual practice or associated with promiscuity. However, Tantra is far more than just sexual techniques. It's a holistic practice encompassing spirituality, personal growth, and deep connection. Tantra invites you to explore your sexuality in a mindful and conscious way, but it's not just focused on gratification. It is a path of self-discovery, love, and spiritual awakening. Tantra Beyond the Bedroom While Tantra holds a significant place in the realm of sexuality, its benefits extend far beyond the bedroom. It offers a way of life, guiding you to cultivate self-love, embrace your true potential, and engage with the world through mindfulness and compassion. By incorporating tantric principles into everyday life, you can experience a profound transformation that extends to your relationships, career, and overall well-being. Tantra: A Pathway to Self-Discovery Tantra is a rich and multifaceted practice that offers you a pathway to self-discovery, spiritual growth, and enhanced intimacy. By exploring Tantra's origins, principles, and various aspects, beginners can embark on a transformative journey that leads to a deeper connection with themselves, their partners, and the universe at large. So, take the first step and embrace the ancient practice of Tantra to unlock your fullest potential and embrace a life filled with love, pleasure, and enlightenment.

Tantra is a practice that has been shrouded in mystery and misinterpretation for centuries. It is often associated with spirituality, sexuality, and the pursuit of enlightenment. However, understanding the true essence of Tantra involves delving deeper into its history, principles, and practice. Understanding the Basics of Tantra Before exploring the intricacies of Tantra, it's helpful to understand its basic concepts. Tantra originated thousands of years ago, with its roots firmly planted in Indian and Tibetan traditions. Both Hinduism and Buddhism have embraced Tantra as a transformative spiritual path. Tantra is a rich and complex spiritual tradition that encompasses various practices and beliefs. It is not simply about sexual rituals or exotic practices, as it is often misunderstood. Instead, Tantra is a holistic approach to life, aiming to integrate all aspects of our being – physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual. The Origins and History of Tantra Tracing the origins of Tantra takes us back to ancient India, where its philosophy and practices emerged. It is believed that Tantra evolved as a rebellion against the rigid societal structures and orthodox rituals of the time. The name "Tantra" comes from the Sanskrit word meaning "woven together," symbolizing the union of various elements for spiritual growth. As Tantra developed, it absorbed influences from different cultures and traditions, blending them into its unique tapestry. It drew inspiration from ancient Vedic rituals, yogic practices, shamanic traditions, and even elements of indigenous wisdom. The Evolution of Tantra Over time, Tantra became a multifaceted system incorporating elements of philosophy, meditation, rituals, and yoga. It gained popularity in both Hindu and Buddhist traditions, adapting to their respective ideologies and practices. In Hinduism, Tantra became a path to transcendence, allowing practitioners to connect with the divine through rituals, mantras, and meditation. It aimed to awaken the dormant spiritual energy within, known as Kundalini, and guide it towards enlightenment. In Buddhism, Tantra took on a different form, known as Vajrayana or "Diamond Vehicle." It incorporated esoteric practices and rituals, focusing on the transformation of ordinary experiences into spiritual realizations. Vajrayana Tantra aimed to accelerate the path to enlightenment, providing a direct and expedient means to attain liberation. The Core Principles of Tantra At the heart of Tantra lie several core principles that guide its practitioners on their spiritual journey. These principles include non-duality, interconnectedness, embracing both light and dark aspects, and using various techniques to harness and channel energy. Tantra encourages you to recognize the divinity within themselves and everything around them. It emphasizes the unity of body, mind, and spirit, aiming to transcend the limitations of the ego and experience a deeper connection with the universe. Non-duality is a fundamental principle of Tantra, recognizing that all dualities are ultimately illusory. It teaches that the separation between self and other, good and bad, and sacred and profane is an illusion. Through Tantra, practitioners seek to dissolve these distinctions and realize the underlying interconnectedness of all things. Another important principle of Tantra is the acceptance and integration of both light and dark aspects of existence. Tantra recognizes that life is a tapestry of experiences, encompassing joy and sorrow, pleasure and pain. By embracing the totality of our experiences, we can cultivate a deeper understanding and acceptance of ourselves and the world around us. Tantra also emphasizes the harnessing and channeling of energy, both within ourselves and in our interactions with others. Through various practices such as breathwork, meditation, and physical exercises, Tantra seeks to awaken and cultivate the vital life force energy known as Prana or Chi. This energy can then be directed towards spiritual growth, healing, and transformation. In conclusion, Tantra is a profound spiritual path that offers a holistic approach to life and self-realization. Its origins in ancient India and subsequent evolution in Hinduism and Buddhism have shaped its diverse practices and beliefs. By understanding the basic concepts and principles of Tantra, one can embark on a transformative journey towards self-discovery and spiritual growth. The Different Paths of Tantra As Tantra spread across different cultures and beliefs, it took different forms and paths. Understanding these paths can provide a broader perspective on the diverse approaches to Tantra. Tantra, with its rich and ancient history, has evolved and adapted to various religious and spiritual traditions. Let's explore two prominent paths of Tantra: Hindu Tantra and Buddhist Tantra. Tantra in Hinduism In Hinduism, Tantra is often associated with the worship of deities and the use of rituals and ceremonies to access divine energy. This path focuses on mantras, yantras (sacred symbols), and the use of rituals to transcend the mundane and connect with higher realms of consciousness. Hindu Tantra encompasses a wide range of practices, including meditation, breathwork, and the exploration of the subtle energy centers within the body known as chakras. It emphasizes the union of the individual self with the divine, seeking to awaken the dormant spiritual potential within each practitioner. One of the key aspects of Hindu Tantra is the recognition and reverence of the feminine energy, known as Shakti. This divine feminine energy is seen as the creative force behind the universe and is often personified as various goddesses. Tantric rituals and practices in Hinduism aim to awaken and cultivate this Shakti energy within oneself, leading to spiritual growth and self-realization. Through the practice of Hindu Tantra, people seek to harmonize their physical, mental, and spiritual aspects, ultimately aiming to attain liberation from the cycle of birth and death. Tantra in Buddhism In Buddhism, Tantra, also known as Vajrayana, plays a significant role in certain traditions. It involves the use of rituals, meditation techniques, and visualizations to attain enlightenment swiftly. Tantric Buddhism emphasizes the importance of a qualified teacher, known as a lama, to guide practitioners on their spiritual path. Buddhist Tantra incorporates elements from both Mahayana and Theravada Buddhism, integrating them with the principles and practices of Tantra. It is believed that through the skillful use of Tantric methods, practitioners can transform ordinary experiences into opportunities for spiritual awakening. One of the distinctive features of Buddhist Tantra is the use of mandalas, intricate geometric patterns that symbolize the universe. Mandalas are used as visual aids during meditation, helping practitioners to focus their minds and cultivate a deep sense of concentration and insight. Furthermore, Buddhist Tantra places great emphasis on the cultivation of compassion and the realization of emptiness, the understanding that all phenomena lack inherent existence. Through the practice of Tantra, Buddhist practitioners aim to purify their minds, overcome delusions, and attain enlightenment for the benefit of all sentient beings. By exploring the different paths of Tantra in Hinduism and Buddhism, we gain a deeper appreciation for the diverse approaches to spiritual growth and self-realization. Whether through the worship of deities and rituals in Hindu Tantra or the use of meditation and visualizations in Buddhist Tantra, Tantra continues to be a profound and transformative spiritual path for seekers around the world. Misconceptions About Tantra Tantra often carries a misperception that it revolves primarily around sexuality and sensuality. However, this is just one aspect of Tantra, and focusing solely on it fails to grasp its broader spiritual significance. Tantra and Sexuality: Clearing the Confusion While Tantra acknowledges the power of sexual energy, it encompasses far more than just physical pleasure. In Tantra, sexuality is seen as a sacred act and a potent force that, when harnessed mindfully, can lead to spiritual transformation. It is essential to understand that Tantra regards sexuality as a means to connect with higher consciousness and cultivate deep intimacy with oneself and others. It involves embracing the divine feminine and masculine energies within each individual, going beyond the mere physical act. Tantra as a Religious Practice vs. Lifestyle Another misconception about Tantra is the belief that it is exclusively a religious practice. While Tantra has roots in religious traditions, it is not limited to any specific faith. It is a holistic lifestyle that can be incorporated into one's spiritual beliefs and everyday existence. Practicing Tantra involves adopting a mindful and conscious approach to life, embracing the principles of interconnectedness, self-discovery, and spiritual growth. It offers tools and practices that can enhance various aspects of one's life, including relationships, health, and overall well-being. The Practice of Tantra Now that we have explored the essence of Tantra and dispelled some misconceptions, let's delve into its practical aspects and how one can integrate it into daily life. Tantra Meditation Techniques Meditation forms an integral part of the Tantric practice, allowing you to cultivate mindfulness, inner peace, and spiritual awakening. Tantra meditation techniques often involve the use of breath awareness, visualizations, mantras, and body movements to quiet the mind and expand consciousness. These techniques serve as gateways to transcendental experiences, helping practitioners connect with their higher selves and the universal energy that permeates all things. The Role of Rituals in Tantra Rituals hold a significant place in Tantra, serving as powerful tools to access the divine and transform consciousness. Rituals can range from simple daily practices to more elaborate ceremonies, depending on one's preference and spiritual goals. Through rituals, practitioners create sacred spaces, engage their senses, and connect deeply with their intentions and desires. Rituals in Tantra often involve the use of specific gestures, symbols, and offerings to invoke divine energy and enhance spiritual experiences. The Impact of Tantra on Health and Well-being Practicing Tantra can have profound benefits on both emotional and physical well-being. It offers a holistic approach that integrates mind, body, and spirit for overall health and balance. Emotional Benefits of Tantra By embracing the principles of Tantra, you can cultivate a deeper sense of self-acceptance, compassion, and love. Tantra allows for the exploration and healing of emotional wounds and unhealthy patterns, freeing you to live more authentically and joyfully. Through practices such as breathwork, meditation, and conscious touch, Tantra empowers you to develop healthier relationships, enhance intimacy, and experience greater emotional connectedness with themselves and others. Physical Benefits of Tantra Tantra recognizes the body as a sacred vessel and invites you to explore and honor their physicality. Through mindful movement, dance, yoga, and other practices, Tantra supports physical well-being, flexibility, and vitality. The energy-based practices in Tantra help to awaken and circulate life force energy, promoting vitality, sexual health, and overall rejuvenation. By harnessing and channeling sexual energy, Tantra enables you to experience heightened states of pleasure and bliss. A Holistic Approach to Self-Discovery Tantra is a profound spiritual path that encompasses much more than mere sexuality. Its rich history, core principles, and diverse paths make it a holistic approach to self-discovery and spiritual growth. By understanding the essence of Tantra and dispelling misconceptions, you can tap into its transformative power and unlock the potential for profound personal and spiritual development.